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I love Patrick RothfussFollow

#1 Nov 26 2013 at 2:32 AM Rating: Good
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He managed to be right on the internet. He discovered an article he liked about something he'd never heard about before: Revenge ****. He linked it on Facebook and later was dismayed about about where the comment discussion went. So he wrote another post, and managed to convert 150 people to his way of thinking. After reading 150 replies, he decided not to push his luck, stopped reading, and called it a win.

https://www.facebook.com/Patrick.Rothfuss
Patrick Rothfuss wrote:
Okay folks: we're having a teachable moment here.

Before things spiral further out of control in the comments of my previous post, let me explain a few things.
There's a couple variations of this statement cropping up: "If she didn't want anyone to see them, why did she take nude pictures of herself in the first place?"
This is called blaming the victim, and, simply said, it's not a very cool thing to do.

It's like if someone stole 200 bucks off me, and you rolled your eyes and said, "Well what do you expect, walking around with all that money in your pocket?"
While it's true that they couldn't have taken my money if I hadn't been carrying it, the entire comment misses the point.
If I am robbed, the fault for the robbery, *ALL* the fault, rests in the hands of the thief.

Similarly, if I have naked pictures of myself on my computer, that's really my own ******* business. It's not asking for trouble.
Delighting in your own body is not a crime. Being attractive is not a crime. Being sexually active or alluring is not a crime. Being a woman is not a crime.
None of these things are valid invitations to committing a crime, either.
You need to realize this.

Now it could very well be that you would never think of taking a nude photo of yourself. So when you find out someone has done that, you're baffled. You might ask yourself, in the quiet of your mind, "Why would someone do that?"
That is a fair question. That is a *good* question. That is a question that shows empathy. It shows you're curious as to the inner workings of another human.
A certain amount of incredulity is also reasonable, if it's something really outside your realm of experience. That's fair too.

But if the only answer you can come up with is along the lines of, "Someone would only have a naked picture of themselves if they're a **** who secretly desires to be raped."
Well... that's a problem. That is not reasonable. That is some really dark ****.
But that doesn't mean you're a bad person. I'd like to stress that.
What's happening here is that you've been accidentally poisoned by our culture.

We absorb cultural knowledge starting when we're very, very young. The same way we learn language. The same way we learn the difference in the words "slim" and "slender."
This sort of cultural knowledge isn't taught. We simply soak it up.
And some of it is good. This is how we learn to love. This is how we learn about humor. This is how we learn about ephemeral things like justice and fairness.
But we also soak up some of the culture's negative things too. And our culture has a problem with women. And sex. And women AND sex together.... well, we *really* have a problem with that.
So if some part of you *thinks* "Only a **** would..." that's understandable. It's not good, but it's understandable. In some ways that's what you've been trained to think by the culture you've been raised in.

But you *do* need to realize that it's wrong.
Similarly, a kid that believes in the Easter Bunny isn't *bad.* We grow up believing all sorts of things, and some of these things are just dead ******* wrong.
But one of the things that makes humans cool is our ability to re-wire our own thoughts. We aren't purely instinctual animals. We're able to adapt. We are, with some difficulty, able to un-learn wrong things.
We can, if we're careful, find our own junk code, and reprogram ourselves to be different, better people.

Now if "A woman would only have a naked picture of themselves if they're a **** who secretly desires to be raped," is the *only* possible answer you can come up with.... I'm sorry.... but you really might have some problems that you should talk to someone about. Seriously.
Gech. This is already too long for a facebook post. I might continue this topic on my blog later on. This **** is important, and it bears discussing in a better venue.

We need to be good to each other, people.

So be good.

pat
#2 Nov 26 2013 at 2:47 AM Rating: Excellent
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He still needs to quit touring around and hurry up and write The Doors of Stone already though.
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#3 Nov 26 2013 at 3:10 AM Rating: Good
I don't understand, what's wrong with stealing?
#4 Nov 26 2013 at 7:40 AM Rating: Excellent
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I'm missing whatever jump he took from "took nude pictures" to "wants to be raped". Granted, I didn't read the original comments, etc but I don't think revenge **** (as I understand it: distributing sexually explicit materials of your ex) has a whole lot to do with "she wants to be raped".

Edited, Nov 26th 2013 7:41am by Jophiel
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Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#5 Nov 26 2013 at 7:57 AM Rating: Good
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Yeah, there's some ridiculous jumps in that post.
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#6 Nov 26 2013 at 8:25 AM Rating: Good
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Anyone got a tl;dr for me?
#7 Nov 26 2013 at 8:27 AM Rating: Excellent
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Just because a girl takes sexytime pictures doesn't mean she wants to be raped.

Can you even want to be raped? Doesn't the desire to be raped preclude the literal definition of rape and make it not-rape?
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#8 Nov 26 2013 at 9:26 AM Rating: Good
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There are plenty people with a fetish for rape-play but that's pretend rape with people you know and trust (or arranged by people you know and trust at the very least) so it's not really rape anymore.
#9 Nov 26 2013 at 9:28 AM Rating: Good
Explanation: Some of the pictures posted as revenge **** are not actually owned by ex-boyfriends. They were selfies taken by the girl and she got hacked.
#10 Nov 26 2013 at 9:33 AM Rating: Excellent
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What does that have to do with rape?
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#11 Nov 26 2013 at 9:38 AM Rating: Good
Catwho wrote:
Explanation: Some of the pictures posted as revenge **** are not actually owned by ex-boyfriends. They were selfies taken by the girl and she got hacked.


That's explicitly said in the first post.

Great explanation, though, very Edifying; an excellent demonstration of Murphy's law.
#12 Nov 26 2013 at 9:39 AM Rating: Good
Jophiel wrote:
What does that have to do with rape?


Is that a serious question? Some people assumed that no-one would have those pictures in the first place unless they secretly wanted to be raped. The post Ari quoted was in response to those people.
#13 Nov 26 2013 at 9:53 AM Rating: Excellent
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Kavekk wrote:
Is that a serious question?

Yeah, it is. Because there's a bizarre leap from the first paragraph or two of "Well, if someone saw the photos then it's your fault for having taken them" which is an understandable if poorly thought out argument to the third paragraph of "If you took nude photos it's because you're a **** who wants to be raped" which is just batshit insanity. Having not read the comments themselves, I didn't know if the OP guy was directly quoting or making his own leap from comparing distributing photos to being raped.

Edited, Nov 26th 2013 9:54am by Jophiel
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Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#14 Nov 26 2013 at 10:14 AM Rating: Excellent
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Guy gets trolled on the internet; doesn't realize it.

Good stuff. Smiley: popcorn
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#15 Nov 26 2013 at 10:16 AM Rating: Excellent
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Was it me? Did Ari troll me?
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#16 Nov 26 2013 at 10:18 AM Rating: Excellent
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Probably.

I was mostly thinking of Patrick though.
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#17 Nov 26 2013 at 10:42 AM Rating: Good
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Dread Lörd Kaolian wrote:
He still needs to quit touring around and hurry up and write The Doors of Stone already though.


This is literally the only reply that matters.

[EDIT]

Though I suppose I can accept him helping with Tides of Numenera...

Edited, Nov 26th 2013 12:16pm by idiggory
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#18 Nov 27 2013 at 6:36 AM Rating: Good
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I'd let him off for time on Captive Prince Volume 3, but I don't want S.U. Pacat or Rothfuss to dilute each other one bit.
#19 Nov 27 2013 at 7:48 AM Rating: Decent
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If my 24 year old daughter let a pic of her left boob get stolen, I'd probably remind her to take better care of her stuff.

Or you know, make a huge deal about it, **** off a bunch of scruple-less interworld hackers, write a blog, get the attention of some second rate fantasy author and ..SCORE.
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#20 Nov 27 2013 at 7:52 AM Rating: Good
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So what you're saying is that a picture of her left boob exists, just hasn't been distributed yet?
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#21 Nov 27 2013 at 7:56 AM Rating: Good
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lolgaxe wrote:
So what you're saying is that a picture of her left boob exists, just hasn't been distributed yet?

I did an image search for 'my daughters left boob' and didn't see anything that looked familiar.
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#22 Nov 27 2013 at 8:12 AM Rating: Excellent
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Elinda wrote:
If my 24 year old daughter let a pic of her left boob get stolen, I'd probably remind her to take better care of her stuff.

Like her boobs?

Is that what happened here? I mean, the catalyst for this guy writing his original column? [Edit: Guess not, per the OP -- he saw an article on something he'd never heard of. Really? He'd never heard of revenge ****? Makes me wonder if I should worry for him or worry for me for knowing about it]

Edited, Nov 27th 2013 8:13am by Jophiel
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#23 Nov 27 2013 at 8:21 AM Rating: Good
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Jophiel wrote:
Elinda wrote:
If my 24 year old daughter let a pic of her left boob get stolen, I'd probably remind her to take better care of her stuff.

Like her boobs?

Is that what happened here? I mean, the catalyst for this guy writing his original column? [Edit: Guess not, per the OP -- he saw an article on something he'd never heard of. Really? He'd never heard of revenge ****? Makes me wonder if I should worry for him or worry for me for knowing about it]

Edited, Nov 27th 2013 8:13am by Jophiel
You knew about butterfaces too. Smiley: um
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#24 Nov 27 2013 at 8:24 AM Rating: Excellent
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Well, yeah. I wanted to know why all my revenge **** was cropped off at the neck.
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#25 Nov 27 2013 at 8:26 AM Rating: Good
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I just learned about Bathtub Girl today. Smiley: um
#26 Nov 27 2013 at 8:28 AM Rating: Excellent
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You do seem to have a thing for gross-out bathroom images.

Smiley: um
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
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