Insult Contest This Saturday Midgard/Guinevere

A tiny kobold steps from behind the base of tall pine tree. His light steps barely disturb the powdery white snow blanketing the land. Trailing a few steps behind him a large toad hops through the snow the best it can. It's glossy black eyes focused on the bow toting kobold. He turns to look and smiles as he brushes some snow from his hair. "Ig der lat. Mi gled tu see yus ut ere. Mi weld like tu hab you com tu ur festy tu Loki. Its husted by me clan de Wafmen uf De bifrust. Dis festy will be en de bur uf Audilblah startin et 3 PM EST un MARCH 30th. Der will be free meeds, pudins, meets, end de veggie tings fur ell tu hab. Dis be a grund celebreshun tu da greet gud det es Loki by huvin de ferst eber insult contest fur ell uf midgard. Yu knuw ell dem tings yu sey when yus drunk ir tu taunt de allbies ir de punty eers. Wells eres yur chence tu let dem be heerd. Yus lats will be paired egainst wen anudder end each lat will hab uh chunce tu giv yur best insult end tree runds. Su dets tree insults per lat. Yus den judged by de panel uf me clannies en urginality, funnies, end huw fittin et be tu midgard. Dis be single elimneshun ting su de winner muves en tu furder runds end de luser gets sum meed. Fur first plec de prize be sixty uf dem guld shinies, secend gets tirty uf dem, end tird gets ten. Der mebe uder duur prizes giben ut if yur lucky. Me hups tu see yu der lats if yus be tinking abut yus cen cuntect me et wif de mojo e-birdy ting et ROCKX10@AOL.COM ir yus cen telk tu me arind midgurd. We will ulso sev a few sputs fur welk ens. Su we hup tu see yu der fur a dey uf merriment lefter end guud times. Put dun de ex end com drink sum meed wif yir midgard brudders. Dis be wen time ets ukki fur kibi, trill, end pinks tu perty tugeder... oh yib me clannies wrute dis note if yu nib understend me." he says as he takes a rolled up scroll out of his belt pouch and carefully unrolls it. Pulling an arrow from his quiver he fastens the scroll to the pine tree behind him. With a quick wave and a smile he turns and darts off. You walk up to the scroll and it reads ... Skal! Greets friends on behalf of the Watchmen of the Bifrost we would like to invite you and all of Midgard to our Festival of Loki. The people of Audilton have been kind enough to lend us their bar so the festivities have been planned to start at 3pm EST at March 30th. And we have an army of cooks working so there will be plenty of mead, fine meats, sweet treats, fruits, vegetables, and pretty thralls. The festival will culminate in a contest of wits and insults. You and another lad will go head to head for three round, one insult apiece, to see who can get the most laughs for a board of judges. Simple really lads the winner goes to the next round and the loser can drink his sorrows away. Yah be competing for the top prize of sixty gold coins, thirty for second, and ten for third. So come on out and watch or participate in the fun put down your steel for one day and relax. Grab some mead and enjoy the company of the people of Midgard. Stragglers will be accepted into the contest but it would be helpful if you could magically contact us via an e-pigeon at ROCKX10@aol.com or send a little pigeon to that kibi Jatar. Remember this is all for fun and good laughs so show us your viking spirit! Hope to see yah there! Signed, The Watchmen of the Bifrost

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