Last night, I took my BLM/WHM to the dunes. It was to be the first time I was the nuker in a party instead of a healer or melee. I get an invite and accept then look over the party list. 2 blm/whm, a whm, a rdm, a ranger and a nin. Not a bad setup on first glance but the NIN couldn't tank until they got 1000 more exp. The leader searched high and low for a war and found one then it was pointed out that we already had a full group. I was just sitting back, watching the conversation flow by while I played with my Blaze Spikes.
<party leader> I'm really sorry but I'm going to have to boot someone so we can have a war. Please don't get mad.
Next thing you know, I'm no longer in a party but I didn't say anything, I wasn't mad because they did need a war. A tell appears on my screen while I have my LFP flag up.
<party member> Why the hell did he kick you?
<me> because the party needs a war to be effective, not another blm/whm.
<party member> but aren't you mad about it?
<me> no, he had to do what he did for the good of the party. I can always get another party or go farm until I find one.
<party member> wow, impressive
/em smiles warmly.
<party member> I know I'd be fuming if it was me that got kicked out.
<me> lol, I learned a while ago that getting angry over something small like this is just wasted energy that can be put to use elsewhere. I just look at it from a logical perspective.
The conversation continued for a little bit before my former party went off to start their killing spree. But the conversation did leave me thinking... Why do people get so mad over the little things? Can they really be so self-centered that they think the world will collapse if things don't go absolutely their way? Perhaps I'm an oddball in thinking that everyone should just do what they can to help others, even if it means giving up a spot in a party in a video game for a job that is more needed then mine.
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honestly I don't know but I've seen it more often than not... typically I play WHM in parties.. so in a tight situation like that I'm not even a candidate for dropping..
but it's good of you to see the situation for what it is.. and take it in stride. ^_^
but it's good of you to see the situation for what it is.. and take it in stride. ^_^
Good attitude. Leader should have sent you a /tell though. I agree with you about the "little" things getting people upset.
Waiting for a pt can be a hassle sometimes (not usually as BLM) but I usually just go fish or go to Konstatt and kill stuff to pass the time.
Why waste the energy on getting upset and there is always tomorrow.
Waiting for a pt can be a hassle sometimes (not usually as BLM) but I usually just go fish or go to Konstatt and kill stuff to pass the time.
Why waste the energy on getting upset and there is always tomorrow.
43 posts
I ran into a similar problem yesterday.
But it worked out well. I started with my party in the dunes, we traveled to quifm together adn then to the lower tower and got my blm from 18 to 23.
It pays to be understanding sometimes.
But it worked out well. I started with my party in the dunes, we traveled to quifm together adn then to the lower tower and got my blm from 18 to 23.
It pays to be understanding sometimes.
Yeah, guess I still don't understand the impatience a lot of people have in the game. What I think is really funny is that when I was leveling whm, people would apologize for not being able to take the hate away whenever I used Bene. I've seen some whms get mad because of their self-inflicted deaths and I wonder why. Like I kept telling my party, it was only death and the exp can be regained.
No worries black mages are needed in the Dunes, You will get a party real quick. They need you for crabs and pugils and you also deal some nice damage to the lizards with aero. Took my blm only around 5-10 min of waiting to get a party. Good luck ASirae, hope to seek you in the game :).
I tip my hat to you sir.
Yeah, i have the same attitude, its not worth getting all worked up over the most rediculous things. While everyone is ranting and raving about dying, and not getting a raise I just HP and patiently wait (at lower levels), when I am arranging parties I wait until I can find the members I need. Anyone who actually has teh patience to wait with me is never disappointed. Usually in the same situation as you encountered, someone usually volunteers to leave, lets face it, your not getting any exp without a tank or healer etc.
But anyway, everyone at one point or another has a me first attitude in some respects, even me. But not all the time, wich is when things get retarded, cant please everyone.
Sometimes you just got to do what you got to do.
Yeah, i have the same attitude, its not worth getting all worked up over the most rediculous things. While everyone is ranting and raving about dying, and not getting a raise I just HP and patiently wait (at lower levels), when I am arranging parties I wait until I can find the members I need. Anyone who actually has teh patience to wait with me is never disappointed. Usually in the same situation as you encountered, someone usually volunteers to leave, lets face it, your not getting any exp without a tank or healer etc.
But anyway, everyone at one point or another has a me first attitude in some respects, even me. But not all the time, wich is when things get retarded, cant please everyone.
Sometimes you just got to do what you got to do.
We need more people like you in this game. ^^
/em tips her hat to you
I don't see why either. :\ My LS used to have a member who was really impatient and got upset with just about anything and everything that didn't go his way/ he didn't like.
We were doing BCNM (mind you, it was our first time) And I made damn well sure to tell eveyone our first few tries might not go so well, that it takes some time to learn. So we go in, everythings fine, and the black casts flood, the DRK didn't land stun in time.
Me and the member (he was PLD) were fighting for about 2 hours. By fighting, I mean him yelling at me and I, even though he should be the one saying it, saying I was sorry. At first it was in tell, but then he started yelling in the LS, so everyone heard. Told me some pretty nasty things, and I just stood there and took it. --; To my surprise one of our quietest members stood up for me. ^^; Ever since then we've been best friends and theres no way to shut her up.
But my point is the same as yours. If little things happen, like a death when helping or if something goes wrong for you, take time to look over things before you burst out into a fight with someone.
Anyway, good luck to you! /salute
/em tips her hat to you
I don't see why either. :\ My LS used to have a member who was really impatient and got upset with just about anything and everything that didn't go his way/ he didn't like.
We were doing BCNM (mind you, it was our first time) And I made damn well sure to tell eveyone our first few tries might not go so well, that it takes some time to learn. So we go in, everythings fine, and the black casts flood, the DRK didn't land stun in time.
Me and the member (he was PLD) were fighting for about 2 hours. By fighting, I mean him yelling at me and I, even though he should be the one saying it, saying I was sorry. At first it was in tell, but then he started yelling in the LS, so everyone heard. Told me some pretty nasty things, and I just stood there and took it. --; To my surprise one of our quietest members stood up for me. ^^; Ever since then we've been best friends and theres no way to shut her up.
But my point is the same as yours. If little things happen, like a death when helping or if something goes wrong for you, take time to look over things before you burst out into a fight with someone.
Anyway, good luck to you! /salute
I applaud you! People with such consideration are so rare these days, your post rekindled my faith in the goodwill of others. I too had to leave a party in the same sort of circumstances, and I was happy to leave if it meant the party would function better. After all, there's always someplace where you're needed ^^
Why do people get so mad over the little things? Can they really be so self-centered that they think the world will collapse if things don't go absolutely their way?
As Americans we are bombarded by media throughout our entire day. Television and movies are constantly pumping drama or comedy or action or anything besides the mediocrity that is daily life into our eyes and ears.
As a result many people come to believe that the mediocre parts of daily life are abnormal and that they always need to be doing something interesting or exciting.
Since most of them simply can't find that much to do they tend to trump up the "little things" into dramatic issues on par with those of their favorite tv characters.
Or they are just attention wh*res.
Perhaps I'm an oddball in thinking that everyone should just do what they can to help others, even if it means giving up a spot in a party in a video game for a job that is more needed than mine.
Some people just don't have the ability to weigh priorities. In their minds everything becomes urgent and superimportant.
As Americans we are bombarded by media throughout our entire day. Television and movies are constantly pumping drama or comedy or action or anything besides the mediocrity that is daily life into our eyes and ears.
As a result many people come to believe that the mediocre parts of daily life are abnormal and that they always need to be doing something interesting or exciting.
Since most of them simply can't find that much to do they tend to trump up the "little things" into dramatic issues on par with those of their favorite tv characters.
Or they are just attention wh*res.
Perhaps I'm an oddball in thinking that everyone should just do what they can to help others, even if it means giving up a spot in a party in a video game for a job that is more needed than mine.
Some people just don't have the ability to weigh priorities. In their minds everything becomes urgent and superimportant.
I've noticed since I started this thread that I'm finding more parties of people actually helping each other out. Maybe the good people are finally cutting away at the annoying people and making them go away. In the past, I had met a number of people with advanced jobs that acted like total spoiled brats but recently, all the ones I've met have been very helpful with their advice.
11 posts
I would like to just take a moment to applaud all of you. It's rare that people step up and spread the good news, instead of the bad.
All the gil-farmers and whatnot us "regular" players have to deal with could not stand I chance if we all look out for each other. For instance, with my BLM, I needed drain... A high level friend of mine helped me with the quest but (stupid me), I was unable to complete it because of my mission status, so she bought it for me.
Since then, I have inherited enough money from another player quitting the game (only 100k), that I felt responsible to "pay it forward" (yeah yeah, cheesy, but if you've seen that movie you'll understand). So I bought drain for a BLM in my party that mentioned he didn't have it. (30k that I don't regret spending, because I know that player was very grateful... I also made him promise to pass the karma on when he knew it was appropriate.)
It would be nice if more people in this game thought and felt like this. If everybody just "paid it forward" everytime somebody helped them out (even just a WHM running by casting Protect or Shell on you)... We just might see some improvements in, well.. not just economy, but enjoyment period! Don't spend so much time focusing on the jack-off that worries about having the perfectly built party or ignores you when he could have saved your life. Just remember that someday you'll be in his position. Then it's your turn to either get revenge, or (and this I would recommend much more) completely boggle their mind with unexpected friendliness and helpfulness. Somebody who plays defensively can't help feeling like a fool when another player comes along and unselfishly helps them out.
Anyway, I had better stop now or I never will.
And by the way, Edwardisedward, I was Pixi that night (I think it was that night) on Qufim Island if you remember. Before that party, I had been in two right before that disbanded due to whiny people (not enough exp every single fight, even if we were taking 'em out one after another...)
Players like Edwardisedward (and prob'ly most of the people that have posted on this thread) sure are a big breath of fresh air. Let's remember, it is a game, not a way to make enough money not to worry about a real job, by selling gil =p.
All the gil-farmers and whatnot us "regular" players have to deal with could not stand I chance if we all look out for each other. For instance, with my BLM, I needed drain... A high level friend of mine helped me with the quest but (stupid me), I was unable to complete it because of my mission status, so she bought it for me.
Since then, I have inherited enough money from another player quitting the game (only 100k), that I felt responsible to "pay it forward" (yeah yeah, cheesy, but if you've seen that movie you'll understand). So I bought drain for a BLM in my party that mentioned he didn't have it. (30k that I don't regret spending, because I know that player was very grateful... I also made him promise to pass the karma on when he knew it was appropriate.)
It would be nice if more people in this game thought and felt like this. If everybody just "paid it forward" everytime somebody helped them out (even just a WHM running by casting Protect or Shell on you)... We just might see some improvements in, well.. not just economy, but enjoyment period! Don't spend so much time focusing on the jack-off that worries about having the perfectly built party or ignores you when he could have saved your life. Just remember that someday you'll be in his position. Then it's your turn to either get revenge, or (and this I would recommend much more) completely boggle their mind with unexpected friendliness and helpfulness. Somebody who plays defensively can't help feeling like a fool when another player comes along and unselfishly helps them out.
Anyway, I had better stop now or I never will.
And by the way, Edwardisedward, I was Pixi that night (I think it was that night) on Qufim Island if you remember. Before that party, I had been in two right before that disbanded due to whiny people (not enough exp every single fight, even if we were taking 'em out one after another...)
Players like Edwardisedward (and prob'ly most of the people that have posted on this thread) sure are a big breath of fresh air. Let's remember, it is a game, not a way to make enough money not to worry about a real job, by selling gil =p.
Ya'll rock. Good to be with people who understand that dying once or twice in a party isn't the end of the world!
Also, i tottally agree with the pay it forward thing. I was farming in Tharongi, and there was a whm with a big dhalmel train. Since i had treasure hunter and was farming silk threads, i offered to join her party so she could get better drops. So, she got a TON of Hides, crafted her butt off, and then offered to help me finish my stack of threads off. So i did this and had to head back to sandy. She gave me a free teleport and free pro III shell II.
Nice to be around such wonderful people that make this game what it's supposed to be: Fun.
Also, i tottally agree with the pay it forward thing. I was farming in Tharongi, and there was a whm with a big dhalmel train. Since i had treasure hunter and was farming silk threads, i offered to join her party so she could get better drops. So, she got a TON of Hides, crafted her butt off, and then offered to help me finish my stack of threads off. So i did this and had to head back to sandy. She gave me a free teleport and free pro III shell II.
Nice to be around such wonderful people that make this game what it's supposed to be: Fun.
Scholar
31 posts
Ah.. you all give me hope for Lakshmi. For awhile I was beginning to despair, but with people like you, I think the world is in good hands.
Keep up the good work ^^. I especially like that "pay it forward" idea, but what movie is it from?
Keep up the good work ^^. I especially like that "pay it forward" idea, but what movie is it from?
It's from the movie Pay It Forward, a really good movie with that cute kid and Kevin Spacey. I can never remember the kid's name but he was in Sixth Sense and AI. Just make sure you have tissues because dust might get in your eye *looks around shiftily*
Scholar
31 posts
Cool! Thanks! I'm going to have to look that movie up. I love tear-jerkers ^^.
I've met people who's world collapses when they don't get their way. Its not pretty.
So I can't say I commend you for doing what sane people do in everyday situations; but I can say I did notice that you are sane. Which can't be a bad thing.
Now me on the other hand? I am insane, and I enjoy it emensly. <I can't spell either> So I probably would have dropped from the pt the second they saw a war lfg, but I think of others before myself always.
I'm the guy who pulles the emergency stop on the train when a kid runs in front of it 2 blocks up. I don't care if I hit my head when we stop. I don't care if we can't get it started again for 3 hrs. It was a KID on the tracks, its just as good a reason to be late as if we had hit the kid. Why make the kid pay for it?
Did any of that make sense? I know I got lost.
So I can't say I commend you for doing what sane people do in everyday situations; but I can say I did notice that you are sane. Which can't be a bad thing.
Now me on the other hand? I am insane, and I enjoy it emensly. <I can't spell either> So I probably would have dropped from the pt the second they saw a war lfg, but I think of others before myself always.
I'm the guy who pulles the emergency stop on the train when a kid runs in front of it 2 blocks up. I don't care if I hit my head when we stop. I don't care if we can't get it started again for 3 hrs. It was a KID on the tracks, its just as good a reason to be late as if we had hit the kid. Why make the kid pay for it?
Did any of that make sense? I know I got lost.
The few times where I have been in a situation like that, I sacrifice my spot (unless I'm the only main healer or tank).
Yeah, people do need to not get so stressed about the little things. It causes too much cancer.
Yeah, people do need to not get so stressed about the little things. It causes too much cancer.
Quote:
Why do people get so mad over the little things? Can they really be so self-centered that they think the world will collapse if things don't go absolutely their way?
As Americans we are bombarded by media throughout our entire day. Television and movies are constantly pumping drama or comedy or action or anything besides the mediocrity that is daily life into our eyes and ears.
As a result many people come to believe that the mediocre parts of daily life are abnormal and that they always need to be doing something interesting or exciting.
Since most of them simply can't find that much to do they tend to trump up the "little things" into dramatic issues on par with those of their favorite tv characters.
Or they are just attention wh*res.
As Americans we are bombarded by media throughout our entire day. Television and movies are constantly pumping drama or comedy or action or anything besides the mediocrity that is daily life into our eyes and ears.
As a result many people come to believe that the mediocre parts of daily life are abnormal and that they always need to be doing something interesting or exciting.
Since most of them simply can't find that much to do they tend to trump up the "little things" into dramatic issues on par with those of their favorite tv characters.
Or they are just attention wh*res.
<---- Attention Wh*re. But even I still stop and help whenever possible. My 2 cents is: If you arent having fun playing this G-A-M-E then shut it off and come back to it later when you might have more fun.
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